| I can kick up my heels.
I can raise a glass,
To a good set o’ wheels.
I can ride a pony.
And I can settle a score, between
A couple of friends, no more.
And if I need to,
I can walk the walk.
And if you ask me,
I can talk the talk.
And if I have to,
I’ll stand tall in these here socks,
But I’ll never be on a Wheaties box.
I can make a pie.
I can help pick out an outfit,
To match the color of your eye.
And I can tie a roast.
I can make four different lunches,
And not burn the toast.
If I need to,
I can be a rock.
And if you ask me nice,
Well I would say, just knock.
And if give me the keys,
I can unlock all of your locks,
But I’ll never be on a Wheaties box.
I may not be an Adonis
I might not sink my putts like Tiger Woods
I may not have those washboard abs but I sure can do the wash.
And my ironing is pretty good.
I can prune the plants,
I can stencil a whole floor,
And not ruin my pants.
I can glaze a room,
I can weave a wicked tablecloth,
On my antique loom.
And if you’re cue is slipping,
Here, take my chalk.
And if you want a kung pao.
Well lemme grease my wok.
And if you really gotta have those diamond earrings,
I’ll sell some stocks,
But I’ll never…
No I’ll never…
Never be on a Wheaties box.
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